Stretched Beyond Ourselves

Have you ever gone through a period when you felt you just couldn’t take any more?

My wife has had a chronic illness for a long time and over the years the disabling effect has slowly become more progressive. On top of this I was eventually diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (M.E.). All this changed the direction of our lives. In our stumbling and reaching out to God in the difficulties, there were benefits. We came to know more of a marvellous God and experience His provision, enabling, healing and love in remarkable ways. We began to discover who we really were and in the long term this also brought my wife and I closer together. I’m sure this wouldn’t have happened otherwise.

In recent years I experienced two prolonged periods, where I was stretched far beyond what I felt I could cope with physically, emotionally and mentally. Looking back I can see similarities.

Each time I was tipped outside the boundaries of my comfy little world, into a situation that was totally foreign to me. I was frightened and initially I wanted to escape. However, within me there was a determination to see it through, whatever that meant. I desperately needed His understanding and clung to Jesus as never before.

As the months passed, the emotional and mental pounding was relentless, making me wonder just how much more I could take. Alongside this, even though God seemed distant, He occasionally encouraged me in breath-taking ways. And just when I was sort of getting used to it, God moved in and the desolation lifted as suddenly as it came, with a feeling of tremendous relief and thankfulness.

Afterwards, I saw things from a different perspective. Life still wasn’t a bed of roses, but something had happened within me. I had tapped into resources way beyond myself and also had a realisation, that with Him, we can cope with far more than we realise.

I believe that God longs to raise the level of the game and draw us out of our independent do-it-yourself attitudes, into a total dependence upon Him. This is the Abundant Life.

This is what Oswald Chambers says:

“A saint’s life is in the hands of God like a bow and arrow in the hands of an archer. God is aiming at something the saint cannot see, and He stretches and strains, and every now and again the saint says - ‘I cannot stand any more. God does not heed, He goes on stretching till His purpose is in sight, then He lets fly. Trust yourself in God’s hands. For what have you need of patience just now? Maintain your relationship to Jesus Christ by the patience of faith. - - - The real meaning of eternal life is a life that can face anything it has to face without wavering. If we take this view, life becomes one great romance, a glorious opportunity for seeing marvellous things all the time. God is disciplining us to get us into this central place of power.” Our Utmost for His Highest.

“No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he'll never let you be pushed past your limit; he'll always be there to help you come through it.” 1Corinthians 10:13 The Message Bible

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Flourishing Where We Are Placed

When our grandchildren come to stay, they call it their seaside house. We have been here thirty six years now, almost to the day. A lot has happened during this time, enough to fill a book or two - it’s coming!

When we first moved here, we thought, because it was further south we could grow anything. But the ground is so steep and stony and exposed to the salt-laden winds, most of the precious plants we bought failed in the first year. We had to learn, by trial and error what would flourish. Below our apple tree and in full view of the kitchen window, we have a bank of nasturtiums. It almost seems that the poorer the soil the better they like it. Some years very few leaves appear, but we have a mass of blooms right through from spring to winter. Even after Christmas last year, the yellow flowers were twinkling at me when I raised the blind after my dawn shower.

Having been brought up as far away from the sea as you can get in England, coming here was like a dream fulfilled and I will never take for granted living in this beautiful place. It hasn’t all been a bed of roses though. Yes, we have had some wonderful experiences and times of joy and fulfilment. This was also the place where we found ourselves and Jesus finally caught up with us. But at times the soil has seemed stony and has felt like we had more than our fair share of pain and hardship. We certainly would have not chosen some of the circumstances that we were planted in. But each time Father brought us through and we flourished. Even and especially in the dark periods, we discovered jewels of delight that we would never have known otherwise.

We have no regrets and believe, like the title of the book here and here I am re-reading, that ‘The Best is Yet Ahead.’

“I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.” Isaiah 45:3 New International Version

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Thoughts on the Seasons

A few random thoughts on the seasons.

I looked across the valley this morning and just knew that summer had really arrived. The warm sun and the evening showers have brought out a profusion of wild flowers on the hillside opposite. Despite the effects of global warming, God's seasons continue; seasons that are designed to promote life and abundance on the earth.

This made me think of the 'seasons' we grow through. We start as babies and pass through toddler hood, childhood, teen and progress through life's stages to older age and inevitably, death. This process is God-given and involves continual change and provided we cooperate in the transition, each stage can be a blessing. Unfortunately some of us miss out or get stuck somewhere along the line. There are those we know, who say they missed out on childhood and I certainly faltered somewhere in my teens. As we get older, some of us may even try to buck the trend and act as if we were still in the first flush of youth, rather than go with the divine flow. Hence the popularity of some forms of cosmetic surgery.

The problem is that if we miss out on a stage or try to alter the natural course of things, sooner or later we can experience adverse effects, emotionally, mentally. physically or spiritually.

I feel this is where God's seasons for our individual lives come into play. I believe God pre-arranges or allows times in our lives that are to our advantage, to enable us to flourish, blossom and heal. This is understandable when the sun shines and everything seems to be going fine. We feel good and it is easier to give thanks. But what about the dry periods or what we call the 'hard times?' Surely, even these are allowed for a purpose?

If you are like me, you may be tempted to enjoy life when all seems rosy and give less regard to using the time to build your relationship with God. I sometimes need a catalyst to make me move on and grow up with God; so when the dry times come along, I am forced to dig deep to find the life-giving water that flows from Jesus. That's when we discover that the deserts and wildernesses of life can be the most productive. We need those 'rocky' times, some of us more than others.

I believe the key is to accept and embrace each season of our lives and cooperate with God in the rough and the smooth?

I like to play chess, if only I can find a partner. Life can be like a game of chess! If my opponent lets me win every time then there is no game and I just do not learn or grow.

Where are you today?

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:" Ecclesiastes 3:1 New International Version

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Blossoming Through Difficulty

It's now June and I suppose I can now go out without a coat? That is if the old English saying "Ne'er cast a clout 'ere May is out!" is true? I only recently discovered that this has nothing to do with the months of the year, but refers to the May blossom. It was early this year and we had an abundance. The blossoms appeared as usual, on the bare leafless branches of the blackthorn and were a welcome and beautiful sight in spring.

Some while ago, I went through a very difficult period. Medically I wasn't sure what was happening. On top of that, the work I was involved with came to an end and I seemed to have lost any sense of being. For a while I was unable to drive and later on my walking was restricted. With all these 'props' removed, I found it all very depressing and bewildering and experienced what I called a mini-breakdown.

However, as I got used to the blackness and devastation and kept reaching out to God, He blessed me and reassured me of His presence in ways that I could never have dreamt of. Months later, after He had brought me through, I just knew He had done something concrete inside me. I began to experience a closer walk with Father and discovered talents that had remained dormant for a long time. I doubt whether any of this would have happened otherwise.

It seems that sometimes, God allows us to experience being stripped bare, to draw us closer to Him and to experience His promise, that if we put our trust in Him, we will blossom in a new way.

"He has sent me to bind up the broken hearted -- to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendour." Isaiah 61:1-3 New International Version

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Knocked Down But Not Out!

Our steep seaside garden abounds in foxgloves. Although there were fewer this year, they promised to be the best ever. Their tall erect spikes looked magnificent with their purple flowers. The blooms at the base were already well formed and as the name implies, you can fit your finger tip into their delicate freckled inner.

However, torrential rain and high winds swept through our garden last weekend, while we were away. We returned home to find the foxgloves bent and flattened down to the ground, with their best blooms blown away. They looked a sorry site. My first instinct was to call it a day, pull them up and throw them on the compost heap. I decided however, to wait to see what might happen. Within a day or so, all the spiky ends of the stems had bent round, reared up, and reached for the sky. In the warmth of the sun, the remaining flower buds are already opening up. The plants don't look the same, but they have a beautiful new gracefulness, as if to say "We are not going to take it lying down, we will show you!"

We may get knocked down, flattened and battered by life's events. Perhaps a calamity, death of a loved one, serious illness or financial loss. Whatever it is, the effect upon us can be overwhelming and devastating. We may feel we'll never get through, we're finished, it is just too hard to go on. But as we look to God in our numbness, as we take the hand of Jesus, already reaching out, hope starts to rise. Slowly, as we express the pain within, we begin to be warmed and strengthened by the Son and flourish again.

Sooner or later we will be able to lift our heads and stand tall. We will not be the same, but in looking back, we will know we have come through and have discovered something new and beautiful.

Someone once remarked to me, that with Jesus, we don't fall down, we fall UP!

"He has sent me to bind up the broken hearted -- to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendour." Isaiah 61:1-3 New International Version

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Troubles, Strife and Hardship

The last two years have been difficult for my wife and I, having to find a way through accidents, illness, loss and disability. God brings us through one thing and then there is another! This has made me consider how I view suffering, trials and hardship.

Theologically the answer would depend upon what we mean by suffering I suppose. Whether we mean the usual kind of life's events like illness, loss and tragedy or unavoidable suffering because we are Christians or persecution by others. Suffering has been the subject of countless debates and books and I leave the outcome to the experts and theologians.

I will just give my brief offering in what I see to date:

People have told me that it's character-building. Not the sort of thing I would say to someone in the midst of a hard time. But I can look back and see that I am different. I have found out more who I really am and discovered things I couldn't do before. Whether I've changed for the better I leave to others to decide, although I know it has burnt a lot of the pride out of me.

It is always His promise to bring us through to a better place in Him, provided we look to Him. Looking back I know this to be true. It's just the 'going through' that can be tough and rocky. I cannot honestly say when I am in the thick of it, that I readily say, 'count it all joy,' but I would praise God in knowing that He knows what He is doing.

One thing that is absolutely clear is that it has the potential to draw us closer to God and experience more of His love for us. I doubt very much whether I would have discovered what I have so far without the hardships that focussed my attention on God. Also there have been times, when in the midst of hardship I have been surprised by intense blessings from God. For these reasons alone I can honestly say, that although there have been times when I felt like throwing in the towel, I am thankful because of all the benefits. Benefits in the here and now and for all eternity, that far outweigh the trials.

"And this small and temporary trouble we suffer will bring us a tremendous and eternal glory, much greater than the trouble. For we fix our attention, not on things that are seen, but on things that are unseen. What can be seen lasts only for a time, but what cannot be seen lasts forever." 2Corinthians 4:17-18 Good News Bible

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Firmly Rooted in God's Love

"I pray that you may have your roots and foundation in love, so that you, together with all God's people, may have the power to understand how broad and long, how high and deep, is Christ's love." Ephesians 3:17-18 Good News Bible

Trees fascinate me. I have been shown some vital spiritual lessons through them.

High up on the hill above our village, a grazing field had been turned into a plantation through a forestry scheme. Hundreds of tiny saplings were planted. At first I thought they must have made a mistake, as the site was exposed to the ravages of the severe salt-laden south-westerlies. However, I assumed they knew what they were doing and had chosen species appropriate to the climate and location. I noticed that each one was staked. Not tightly, but loose enough to allow some movement and close enough to provide some support.

Not long after this, I experienced a prolonged extremely difficult time. I had to give up the work I was involved with and I fell ill. I was nearly paralysed by the winds of fear and doubt, buffeted to the ground by illness and parched by the drought of loneliness and grief. There were times when I felt like giving in, but Jesus knew just how much I could take. Each time when I thought I could take no more He was there with his supporting encouragement.

Several years later I can look back and see that I have come through. Somehow I just know that God has placed something firm and solid deep within me. It's nothing I can boast about, because He did it! There's more work to be done, but the strong winds of misfortune and adversity have made me stronger. My roots have gone down further into God's love.

Recently, I went back up the hill to have a look at the field and was amazed by what I saw. Just about all the saplings had survived and were growing into beautiful small trees. There is more growth to come, but all those fierce winds and extremes of weather caused them to put their roots further down into the soil to make them strong.

"He is like a tree growing near a stream and sending out roots to the water. It is not afraid when hot weather comes, because its leaves stay green; it has no worries when there is no rain; it keeps on bearing fruit." Jeremiah 17:8 Good News Bible

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Cruel to be Kind

"I am the real vine, and my Father is the gardener. He breaks off every branch in me that does not bear fruit, and he prunes every branch that does bear fruit, so that it will be clean and bear more fruit. John 15:1-2 Good News Bible

We have a large escallonia bush in our front garden, but it grew old and straggly and stopped flowering. We decided it needed pruning, so following advice, I cut out the dead wood. When I had finished there wasn’t much left. As a friend of ours said - “it’s got two chances, it can live or die.” Thankfully it lived. The following year it sprouted new growth. Now it’s a mass of healthy foliage and covered in pink blossom in season. Just goes to prove that you have to be cruel to be kind.

It reminds me of the time when, owing to burn-out, my Christian work had to finish, work that gave me fulfilment and purpose. I lost sense of awareness and perception and God seemed to have hidden. It was devastating at first, I felt all alone and frightened. I could identify with King Nebuchadnezzar, who was reduced to a brass-bound stump.

But slowly, very slowly I got used to the situation and yielded to God in it, putting my trust in Him. As the months went by I came to realise that without doing anything but looking to Him, I was being changed inside. The Gardener was tending and feeding my roots. He was feeling my feelings with me and I experienced His healing touch. I was learning new ways and rediscovering hidden talent and gifts. Fresh shoots were sprouting. Several years later I could look back and realise that new branches had grown.

I can now honestly say that I am thankful this happened. Through it I have come to know more of the real me and have a broader heart knowledge of God. The journey goes on and there will be more pruning. Hopefully not as drastic as before. The Gardener will use His sharp knife to lovingly trim a branch to encourage further healthy growth.

”Proper pruning is as much a skill as it is an art, since badly pruned plants can become diseased or grow in undesirable ways.” quotation

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Facing the Mountain

"The simple truth is that if you had a mere kernel of faith, a poppy seed, say, you would tell this mountain, 'Move!' and it would move. There is nothing you wouldn't be able to tackle." Matthew 17:20 The Message Bible

One of my weaknesses is procrastination. If there is something I have to do that could be difficult, unpleasant or involves confrontation or stepping into the unknown, I have a tendency to put it off for another day. The trouble is 'another day' may never come.

When I was working for our regional water company, the water supply strategy was changed for the whole area. This was a major undertaking, involving a new reservoir and miles of pipelines. Once the design and construction engineers had completed their work, it was handed over to us operational guys to make it work. The problem was that no one really wanted to do it. Some even thought that some aspects of the project were ill conceived, as the untreated water discharged into a very old water mains of doubtful condition. It was fraught with difficulties and if anything went wrong, the results could be catastrophic and my job would be on the line. For a while I even thought it best to leave things as they were.

I realised however, that it was up to me to get the ball rolling. The time had come to dismiss the doubts and fears and look at what we'd got. This meant getting together those involved, each with expertise in their own field and have a brainstorming session. All the difficulties, technical details, suggestions etc. were written on a board and someone was delegated to go away and make some sense of it. Each time we met, a plan slowly emerged. Preparations were finalised and the day arrived when we were to start the switch over. One of my colleagues was a Christian and we must have prayed over every inch and nut and bolt of that project. The big day came to start the changeover and each day over the next few weeks, we took one step after another, until it was up and running. There were no insurmountable problems.

I learned an important lesson through that experience. Whenever we step out in faith in something new, there is nearly always a trench of fear and doubt to cross. However, when faced square on, the 'mountain' of fear starts to melt away and the seemingly impossible becomes possible.

Nothing is too difficult for God.

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It's Hard ...

“My friends, consider yourselves fortunate when all kinds of trials come your way, for you know that when your faith succeeds in facing such trials, the result is the ability to endure.” (James 1:2-3 (GNB)

I heard someone say, that it’s hard being a Christian! I thought, “compared with what?” The alternative, being out of the Kingdom, is unthinkable.

Several years ago, when I was going through the toughest and loneliest time of my life, two people tried to be helpful. One said, “keep smiling” and I could have hit him. Another remarked, that it will be ‘character building’ and I could have hit her. They might not have been the most sensitive things to say - thankfully, there were several others who had ‘been there’, and were more understanding - but they were right!

When your back is to the wall and your whole world seems to be falling apart and you are really hurting, you’ve two options. You can give up or you lean heavily on Jesus and look to Him to take you through. I never liked hardship - who does? - and suffering wasn’t in my vocabulary. When the going got tough, I would eventually look for a way out, rather than through. Endurance just wasn’t my strongest point.

So God stepped in and allowed the circumstances that would strengthen me. Later on, however, after I had come through, I looked back and realised that somehow, God had done something inside me. Hard to explain, but I just knew. I’m not saying God had finished with me, He was just preparing me for the next stage of the battle.

We really can praise God in the trials, because we know He is always with us and will never, ever let us down.

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